December 17, 2007

  • coupla random musings

    i think i get the worst fortune cookie fortunes ever, hands down. i swear, they're completely retarded. they're always like HUH? or just undercover reprimands disguised as fortunes.  allow me to share w/ u some cases in point:

    1) "be satisfied with what you already have" - to this day, the worst fortune EVER. scratch that. it's not even a fortune. it's something your parents would yell at u.

    2) "do not mistake temptation for opportunity" - yet another reprimand. or an ominous warning.

    3) "if your cookie is in two pieces, the answer is yes" - without a doubt the dumbest fortune i ever got. until last nite... 

    4) "if your cookie is in three pieces, the answer is no" - clearly the idiot companion fortune to #3 above.

    i know there were tons more, but cant remember them off the top of my head. i think i'll save them all from now on until i compile a whole list of them. but seriously tho, who writes these dumb things? how hard is it to just say some trite shit like "you'll have a pleasant surprise today" or "today will be a good day" or some other crap along those lines? do they rilly got monkeys in the back room somewhere typing this shit up? where's homer when u need him? i think i should make some extra scrilla writing up some bomb ass fortunes. i'd make some poor schmuck's day, or at least lift his spirits a lil. cuz u ever notice that chinese food is never accompanied by the brightest of moods? u never eat it when u're having a spectacular day or feeling on top of the world. no, it's always when u're having another uninspired work lunch, hungover, lazy, or just broke as hell. i made up some fortunes w/ the gals while loitering in rome's ciampino airport, and i must say we made some pretty damn good ones.

    on to another topic: hickies- remember those? i was talking to my friend when she discovered two hickies on her neck, courtesy of the guy she's dating. which begged the question, who the hell gives hickies anymore at our age???? she asked if i knew how long they last b/c she's flying home for xmas soon. i was like, uhhh...WRONG PERSON to ask. the last time either of us got one was in high skoo. but seriously, does anyone still give/get these lil suckers anymore? is there a secret dating/relationship world where grown ass adults still give e/o these tacky things? egh.

    well it's late and i feel like shit. nite all.

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